For the folks back at L&C... (Revised Version 1.1) <-- No further revisions allowed!
(Sound like compliance manual?)
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We have casts from various movies and famous singers.
The plot is an old fashioned - damsel in distress, hero to the rescue - type of plot.
Presenting to you:
Frankie: King of POP - Elvis Presley
Joseph: Superman
Clare Chong: Distressed damsel
Wan Tsyr: Charlie's angel's VOICE aka THE VOICE aka CHARLIE(?)
ClareChua, Gine, Sandra, Cassandra: Charline's Angels
Irene: Baddie (from India?)
Alice: Distressed damsel's Distressed mum
Seok Keng & Soon May: Narrators
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Story:
Damsel goes on stage first, screams her lungs out, "HELP". She has been held prisoner by the baddie. Damsel's mum approcahes Superman to help. He comes to the rescue. But failed, he smses charlie to help. Charline's 3+1 angels come along and helps.
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Narrator: This story is a tale told of many years ago. A tale... of many adventures. A tale... of greed... of pain... of heroic acts... and finally... lots of insurance claims...
Elvis sings: It's been a hard day's night... (short one)
Baddie comes out with Damsel, dragging Damsel in. KIDNAPPED.
Baddie: WOI! Stop moving! You move anymore and I'll cut off your tongue and cook curry!
Damsel: Why me? Why Why?
Baddie: You ask too much. What school you're from? Ask so many questions...
Damsel: What do you want from me?
Baddie: I want your VOICE. I want you to sing. Sing for me... SING... SING!!! *evil laugh* (looks at audience) that's what the phantom of the opera says... Not bad, Right?
Damsel: No... (super drama looking) No... NOT MY VOICE... ANYTHING... BUT... my voice...
(FREEZE) (BAddie and Damsel slowly moves out while phone is ringing)
**Phone rings**
Alice at one side, Charline at the other side of stage.
Alice: Charline.. Charline... Is that you?
Charline: Yes, Alice, what can I do for you?
Alice: How did you know it's me?
Charline: You standing at the other side of the stage only mah...
Alice: Oh... Yah... Charline...
Charline: What is it? Why did you call me for? I don't have incoming free. Please talk quickly.
Alice: **talks very fast** My daughter has been kidnapped by a madwoman who wants her voice please help me to rescue her from that madwoman and i will reward you with lots of money this is not a bribery but a payment so please help me.
Charline: **pause** how much?
Alice: $300
Charline: WAH! You think I do charity work ah? I donate to 1900 1185588 fifty times a year, more than $300 ah!
Alice: $300 thousand...
Charline: Oh... Ok lah. I'll see what I can do. Bye.
**Charline turns and make a call** **phone rings**
Charline: Hello Angels...
Angels: Hello Charlie...
**play ˜"harlie angel" theme song, if possible**
Charline: I need you to rescue kidnapped girl. You have ten minutes before the audience gets bored!
Angels: We will, Charline! Good bye Charline...
Narrator: Charline's angels prepared themselves... Mentally and Physically.. for an anticipated grueling and ugly battle that would change the face of earth...
The 3+1 angels come out doing a belly dance (short short rendition 30 sec good enough).
Narrator: (dramatic) OH! LOOK! Behind you. (pause) No... To your left! (pause) NO! To your right... No.... Look up there, on stage!!!
(As narrator talks, dancers remain on stage. Baddie and Damsel appears on stage while audience looks to left and right and back… )
Baddie: (laughs evil laugh with Indian slang) Who are these "belly" pretty belly dancers who pretend to wear saris that are not like sari's at all?
Angel 1: Let go of Clare, right now!
Angels: HIAH!! (fighting positions)
(baddie sits Damsel on a chair, ties her up quickly)
Baddie: You sit here while I make chappati of the angels!
(Play kung fu song)
(Slow motion fight… But with one whack each, Baddie knocks down all angels! All angels lay on ground in pain crying "ai yoh... aiyoh" )
(Play superman Song)
Superman flies in!
Superman: I heard your ai yoh ai yoh from new york. What is the problem?
Baddie: Who are you? Where are you from? Why You wear your underwear outside? Aiyoyo!
Superman: I am a man in tights... It's good to show off my muscular legs and chest.
Angels: Superman!! You're here!! (all look in awe) Help us!
(Play superman music. Superman slow motion, fights with Baddie. Baddie hits and hits, but superman doesn't budge. Superman then takes single finger and hit baddie on forehead. Baddie immediately falls over! Superman takes off and flies away...)
Angels get up and untie Damsel. Alice walks in with Charline.
Alice: Oh my baby! my baby girl! (runs to hug damsel)
Damsel: MUMMY!!!
Charline: Good work Angels!
Angels: Thank you Charline...
Charline: This reminds me of a story... (clears throat) Once upon a time in China... There was a fish in the Yangtze river. He wanted to swim to the sea. But couldn't find his way. In the end, he said to himself, "blessed are those who do not leave the river, for he will find peace." (PAUSE for effect, everyone look puzzled) The moral of the story is... We must always rise up to the occasion and never wear your underwear outside.
(Closing song by Elvis: choose a song)
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It's done... If I missed out out anyone, slot them in.
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